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Getting readyWeeks 32–42

How Can a Birth Partner Help? Before the Birth and During Labor

A birth partner comforts, encourages and helps in practical ways: timing contractions, keeping energy up and knowing when to call. Plan it together beforehand.

Not yet medically reviewed. This article sums up published guidance from the sources at the end. It is not medical advice: follow your own midwife or doctor.

On this page
  1. Before the birth
  2. Early labor
  3. As contractions get stronger
  4. When to call
A partner standing behind a pregnant woman, their hands together on her belly.
Photo by Arteida MjESHTRI on Unsplash

Your support during labor, alongside the hospital staff, can help your partner have a better birth experience. Ask them before the birth what kind of help they would like.

Before the birth

  • Read the birth plan, so you can remind the staff what your partner wants
  • Take a childbirth class together to learn what to expect and how to help
  • Tour the hospital. Ask who can be in the room, where to park and where to check in
  • Time the trip to the hospital, allowing for traffic
  • Have a rear-facing car seat installed well ahead of the due date
  • Arrange care for other children and pets, if needed

Early labor

  • Go for walks together
  • Do relaxation and breathing techniques together
  • Distract your partner with cards or other games
  • Massage their back and shoulders, or put a heating pad or ice pack on their lower back
  • Check the hospital bag is ready

Time the contractions as they come. The contraction timer records how long each one lasts and how far apart they are.

As contractions get stronger

  • Press firmly on their lower back, or massage it with your knuckles or a tennis ball
  • Be a focus point for them during contractions
  • Offer comfort, words of support and small sips of clear liquids
  • Flex their feet if they get leg cramps
  • At the birth, help them hold a position. If they want you hands off, words of support still help

Look after yourself as well. Eat, drink and take short breaks when you can.

When to call

If your partner thinks labor has started, or is not sure, call their provider.

Sources

  1. NHSTips for your birthing partner or partners
  2. NHSThe stages of labour and birth
  3. ACOGA Partner's Guide to Pregnancy
  4. ACOGHow to Tell When Labor Begins
  5. ACOGThinking About Childbirth Without Pain Medication? Here's How to Prepare.
  6. ACOGPreterm Labor and Birth

Last checked .

Written by the MyPregnancy editorial team from the sources above.